My Niche

Hello everyone, I hope all is well and that you all continue to stay safe, well, peaceful, and as content as possible amid the world chaos. Today I have decided to take a risk, a jump, a dive, to share with you all something I have actually been hesitant about sharing because I wanted to keep it separate from my Poetry/Blog. However this is a part of me. It is my niche and I have started this journey awhile back. Now I wish to share it in hopes that it may inspire others to follow their heart and niche and never give up. First I would like to give a little backstory. As many of you know that have kept up with my writing I am a survivor of past abuse, I also have a learning disability that I am still trying to embrace, and I am studying to be a Personal Trainor. I did graduate college in 2006 with an Associates in Science towards Psychology Degree but due to finances and due to my learning challenges I did not continue. I initially wished to be a counselor for victims of abuse. Paths change and at times obstacles can make those paths change. After several jobs in life, ending up needing to pursue Therapy for my own mental and emotional health to heal from the trauma I endured as a child/teen I had many hard times figuring out who I was as a person, what my purpose was, and how I was to make my mark on this earth. A few years ago I decided to study to be a Personal Trainer. I failed the Exam many times and I actually have my retake this month on the 22nd. I will not give up. When I do become certified as a Personal Trainer I have some goals in mind. Eventually when I get to the point in life of becoming financially stable with my profession I wish to donate to places that I care deeply about. One day I will get there. No matter how long it takes me. I made a promise to myself, to my mom especially as she is an inspiration to me too (thank you mom I love you and always will and if you are reading this just know I couldn’t be prouder of having you as my mom no matter what we faced!) I will NEVER give up! I also wish to show my son that anything is possible with a little self patience and determination. Have I felt like giving up during my life? Yes I have. At 38 years old I definitely thought I would have made something of myself by now but you know what? I did. In my own way. Maybe not exactly how I hoped but I am and will get there. One day. As all of you will too. That is my wish for any of you and to carry that on. Do something with your niche and help people in this world. That is the most important thing we can do to make this world a better place. Share our stories, our goals, leave behind legacies. Thank you all my wordpress family as I call you for believing in me as I believe in each of you. With that said I will now share my niche, my work, and I hope you enjoy! I add more of my work over time. Please continue to spread Peace and Love in this world!

~Sara-Loretta Hardin~

https://weltfriedenstellacraftboutique.webnode.com/online-store/

 

Outspokenness

Hello everyone, I hope all are staying as safe and well as possible and may you all enjoy the Holidays between social distancing the best you can with family and friends. I wished to speak on something that is all too familiar to me and to some of you: Outspokenness. It is something that I am quite diligent about and sometimes to the point that I have failed to gather my facts more thoroughly before doing so. I think we all are guilty of that at times and it doesn’t mean we are horrible people. We are who we are due to what any of us have endured and that is also a huge factor in how we handle things present day. Many of you whom have followed my Poetry/Blog and read my writings know that I am a survivor of past abuse by my ex-stepfather. Never in my life did I wish to use what I endured as an excuse for how outspoken I am now. However due to the things that happened to me I did not have a voice and a way to express myself in a healthy manner during those times. I couldn’t have a voice. Therefore as years went by I made a promise to myself that I would have a voice and never allow anyone or anything to take that from me again like he did. With that said some people who do not get to know me or try to understand me may perceive me completely other than I intend. As I am a very sensitive person I also have a barrier of self protection. One of my problems is that I have the tendency to need to be outspoken about everything in life and sometimes even when I think I have looked at every angle there is an angle I forget to see. Now I am one and always have been one to apologize and acknowledge my own mistakes. I am not perfect as no one is. I am sure my loved ones can attest to the fact that I needed to tone down my outspokenness in the past but I have come a long way throughout the years whilst in Therapy for healing from the abuse I endured. It’s still a process. I never meant to hurt anyone with my outspokenness. I just got to a point where I was tired of being walked over, lied to, hurt, and then some. My outspokenness is for myself, for my protection, my sanity, but also for what I stand for in this life for humanity. Maybe some are afraid of that but maybe I can come across a certain way I don’t mean to. Sometimes though maybe we all can take something from listening to someone else’s perspective. We can learn from each other. Being outspoken can feel like a curse sometimes but we should always be outspoken, maybe just tone it down a little for some personalities. Each person is different and handles things differently due to their upbringing. Sometimes we are loud and say we understand but do we really? Do we take the time to understand another persons perspective while keeping our voice? I try my best to although I have at times maybe read into things too much or assumed the worst. Maybe it was my self protection but to the person it was taken as my outspokenness uncalled for or too sensitive or too intense. I think we all should self reflect and ask ourselves why we reacted or feel the way we do. Try to understand another persons outspokenness as well before judging. Now I do not condone the A-holes of the world obviously so disregard that for them. However try to see why you may be intense with your outspokenness at times and try to see if it is worth it or how to maybe go about a conflict or resolution differently. In all reality none of us are mind readers. None of us can see what either of us have been through. Maybe as a society we can try to be better with how we go about our outspokenness depending on circumstances. We may find a better understanding of ourselves when we do and when you know you are the one that is wrong make sure you apologize sincerely. Help yourself gather all the facts and try not to overthink unless there is a reason to. You will save yourself unnecessary turmoil. Be yourself without regrets. 

Peace, Love, and Light

Sara-Loretta Hardin

Thanksgiving

Today I decided to write about something that has a lot of meaning to me but is also overlooked by society and not accurately represented in my opinion. Thanksgiving in the History books told a story yet the Native Americans in this country still get shoved to the side, and who is thankful for their people that also sacrificed so much and made it to where America became America prior to us people from all over the world making it the “melting pot” as told in History books that it is? So first before I continue my rant of feelings I wish to thank ALL the Native American people for any of the sacrifices they continue to make and apologize for the stigma that this National Holiday called Thanksgiving holds because it doesn’t really honor the Native American people as it should. Before judging what I wrote take a step back and try to look at it from that perspective. Thank you. Now I shall share Thanksgiving in my eyes. Each day I wake up to a world anew. Maybe not a world that I envisioned but definitely a new day, another day to be thankful that I woke up breathing, I can walk and talk, hug my child, see everything around me, feel everything around me, talk to loved ones and friends, and live. I’m so very thankful for life even though I may not be content with everything I am still thankful. To wake up each day and know that I have another chance, another opportunity to do something with my life or try to make a difference or bring a smile to someones face, that to me is what I am thankful for. I think we tend to drown ourselves at times with the notion that we NEED certain things in life to be thankful. In all actuality we don’t. You know what we need? We need clarity, peace of mind, love, support, and to realize that we have our will power to be thankful for too. The will power to continue in a torn world, to not suffice to the doom right in front of us. Change within to bear a new day is what we should be thankful for as it gives us the opportunity to learn, to grow, to be there for others that may need us. Be thankful that the light of dawn shines into your eyes and the rush of getting out of bed runs through your body because there is someone out there no matter where that is just as thankful for YOU. 

Peace, Love, and Light,

Sara-Loretta Hardin

Contemplation

Do you ever sit and contemplate about life, time, and everything in between wondering what you could have done differently or what you wish to still do with your life while here on earth? The older that I get I seem to contemplate more. Life changes people, hurt changes people. Not to mention that our pasts shape us into who we are present day. However I feel like there is lost time somewhere in between everything. Yes time is what we all make of it but when you contemplate and realize that you are at the age you are at and the disappointment sets in within yourself you start to realize that there are chances you regret not taking. You realize that you are not as happy as you thought you once were. That security, that safety blanket, ends up being all too revealing what lies beneath. Dissatisfaction. I’ve always been grateful for everything in my life but I am at the point of realizing that there is discontentment I have harbored for a long time. A part of me that needed nurturing like a crying child needs soothing. Each one of us harbors many things and we need to realize that acknowledging when you are not happy does not mean that you are a selfish, ungrateful individual. It means that sometimes there comes a point in time where we must all reevaluate our own lives. Figure out what to do to bring us back to the point of pure contentment even if it may mean a complete life overhaul. As scary as it is sometimes all you can do is take a chance, try to find yourself again. I mean we are all human after all right? Sometimes I wish to see into the future, to know that there is a light that won’t fizzle out. We seek knowledge and love and truth. Yet there is always a mask to the smiling face we come across. A mask of the unknown, some of deceit, some of truth, and time reveals. I contemplate not just on life but on those who hurt me. Sometimes I wish to know more than I know but sometimes I rather not. There is a reason for how everything happens in life and we do have some control over it by the choices we make and the things we allow but at the same time we do not have total control. We just drive that racetrack of the unknowing and go with it. I am at a point in my life where I want to live, feel, take a chance. As we all contemplate in life there is something I wish to say, as the saying goes live with no regrets, because honestly then what is life really about. It’s just wasted if we don’t. So live.

Peace, Light, and Love,

Sara-Loretta Hardin

Changes

Change is the ongoing cycle in life that is completely inevitable. Whether we want it to or not change is like a beacon of light waiting to be reached. Many of us are fearful of change because it is something that we cannot predict. If we could then maybe some of us in life would have had an easier time choosing our paths. It is something partially in our control and partially not in our control. The only ones that can either embrace or deflect change is ourselves no one else. We are responsible for our own actions and reap the repercussions of whatever it may be as well. In life I wish to be an ongoing flame to the candle that is my life so that my days don’t darken and the shadows don’t haunt. I can honestly say that I do not fear change. In my life I fully embrace it even if I stumble or even if I worry about the outcome of things. Yet I wish for clarity and peace and happiness for all those around me. Many of us in the world can attest to that. Change isn’t always easy. You have to unblock the barricade little by little because of the unknown. Never knowing what is on the other side of that heavy boundary lying before you. At times you sacrifice even your own happiness but not because you fear change but because you worry about the impact it will have on those around you. Sometimes time is all you need to take that step forward even if you go backwards a few times and eventually that barricade finally comes down and you can change fully. One day at a time like the chameleon of life. We channel our struggles and our weaknesses and even our strengths through change. Just never allow yourself to stay the cocoon. Keep flying.  

A Fellow Writer

Hello readers and fellow writers,

Today I wish to share something that has arrived that I am so elated about! AshiAkira a fellow writer, poet, who writes amazing Haiku poems is someone who has been an inspiration for a long time for me on this platform. Just as many of you also are inspiring to me with your words and feelings about your own stories whether it be in a poetic form or a blogging form. I am so glad that I have this amazing persons work in my hands now! AshiAkira if you are reading this thank you for showing the world a piece of your heart and art! 

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Wishing you all a wonderful day! Please continue to spread kindness and love in a world of chaos. 

 

Peace, Love, and Bliss,

Sara-Loretta Hardin 

Perseverance

Someone once told me “You have perseverance.” and in the moment I wasn’t really sure of the exact definition of it so I looked it up and understood. A newfound word to my ears that finally connected with my mind and then my heart. Perseverance putting it in short terms is the ability to push yourself through difficulties in life. Many of you out there have perseverance too. As we all have our stories. Sometimes we may not know how we continue to persevere, as unfortunately some souls in this world were lost because they felt they could no longer persevere. I wish to tell each of you that no matter what try your best to live this life, to reach for your full potential, and don’t live with regrets. Reach within yourselves and pull out the qualities you wish to keep and pull out the qualities that you wish to change or work on. Self reflect in this life because isn’t it what life is about? To learn and be better humans and persevere. We all have a yearning inside ourselves that sometimes our immediate lives do not have. It doesn’t mean it makes us ungrateful. I am definitely grateful for my life but as I have gotten older I have realized that there were parts missing. My focus was on so much and when that person told me that I had perseverance for a moment it made me feel like I was such a strong individual. Yet I realized that though I pushed myself through life I wasn’t as strong as some people believed me to be. Sometimes we search for validation from others as a way to feel good. When we all really need to feel within ourselves that we are worthwhile, strong, persevering individuals because in the end we got here, in this moment, regardless of where any of you may be and you know how you got here? You persevered. I’d like you each to please take a moment and ask yourself would you have gotten to this point in life had you not? My wish is that we find it within ourselves to believe the good things without validation from others, that we each learn to love ourselves because I know just how hard that is as I am still a work in progress myself. The focus in life any of us put to make others feel better we need to invest in ourselves too and that is not selfish, that is needed for our well being to continue to persevere. Make those necessary changes in your life that you have been waiting or wanting to do, take a trip, call an old friend, write, craft, work harder than you ever have before, be spontaneous, stop waiting for others to fulfill your happiness, fill your own happiness by living this life until your last breath with no regrets. Whether it be with family or solo. Live……….persevere my fellow humans.

Peace, Love, and Light,

Sara-Loretta Hardin

Peace For ALL Humans

This post may offend some but I cannot put this off much longer. First of all I DO NOT in any way condone racism in any form or fashion and all of you whom read my posts know that of me and the ones whom are in my life know that of me. However things going on present day are getting ridiculous because there is a fine line between peaceful protesting and outright causing more rift between what is already going on in society. 

In watching and reading the news lately I choose very carefully in what to believe and I develop my own opinion because everything can become so distorted and tainted by hearsay by the media and people in general pitting one another against each other. It is very sickening and disheartening. However lately one of the most disturbing things to me besides the killings of innocent individuals is also how these peaceful protests that were supposed to be peaceful have turned violent.

While most of the protesters from various backgrounds have been very peaceful there have been various individuals whom have looted, have vandalized, have hurt others, destroyed buildings, and put forth an image against themselves that have caused an impact in how some people view what is going on and intensifies the situation at hand even more. 

There is no excuse whatsoever for this type of behavior. I feel that no matter the anger or the hurt we as a people as a society need to hold ourselves accountable for our actions and if peaceful protests are not being held then there should be repercussions. 

Do I think it’s right for police officers to use rubber bullets and excessive force as they please? No I do not. However I do feel that they have a right to protect the people and they have a right to protect themselves. Just like not all people from specific communities are bad, not all police officers are bad. The saying that a basket of apples that has one bad apple doesn’t make the entire basket of apples bad right? The point is we cannot judge all humans based on the complete ignorance and stupidity of a handful. 

I also feel that taking Statues, taking flags down, taking things that represent History for the sole purpose of learning and not repeating the same idiocies is the biggest mistake that society can make and it will cause nothing but more catastrophes. We as humans need to keep these symbolic items to teach our future generations why they were there to begin with and what not to repeat. Think about that if you value our future as a society. 

Love, Compassion, Understanding, Empathy, Communication are the main components for Humans to learn to grow and Unite. No one is perfect and no one is going to agree on everything but one can learn to be more understanding and learn to be accepting rather than hateful. Learn to set your differences aside. You may actually learn something about one another. Remember we all came from someplace. We all breathe the same air. 

Next time you talk to your kids about what is going on yes teach them to be proud of where they come from and to embrace the color of their skin but do yourself a favor and teach them to also embrace History and not be afraid to learn about it and move forward while still standing up for what they believe in. Don’t shut it out. 

Please continue to spread Peace, Love, and Light in this world of chaos,

~Sara-Loretta Hardin~ 

Beam Me Up Spock

Everything that is going on right now has made me realize more and more though I always knew this, that the majority of humans are self absorbed, ignorant jerks. I always try to look at the bright side of things but it’s getting harder and harder especially because it seems like not a day goes by that I don’t run in to some self absorbed jerk of a human. Of course we are all human and because of that we make mistakes, hopefully learn from mistakes, carry on and therefore do better because no one is perfect. However, what gave humans the right to treat one another with cruelty and hypocrisy? I guess my world of spreading peace, love, compassion, and so forth is far fetched am I right?

Many of you readers on here who have read my writings or my poetry know that I am a huge supporter of mental health awareness. As I’ve said before we all have our stories, we all have had our share of internal or external turmoil but some of us decide to pick that flower instead of the beast. I suffer with continuous PTSD, Anxiety, and Depression due to the past abuse I endured and I cannot tell you how hard it is to wake up every day and function in society. It is different for each of us that have any type of mental disorder. Do I use it as an excuse? No. Have I ever? No. I choose to pick the flower instead of the beast. Daily I struggle but I choose to be kind to others, I choose to live life to the best of my ability and keep on going even when I feel like giving up. Society makes me want to give up but I don’t.

Humans have failed in so many ways. We have failed one another as humans, friends, lovers, family, and as a general whole to keep this world together. Not perfection but just sanely functioning as a compassionate support system which is how I always dreamed the world should be. I guess I can continue to dream this fantasy of mine.

There are times where instead of the infamous “Beam me up Scottie!” line from Star Trek, I actually think in my head or say “Beam me up Spock!” since Spock was always my favorite. I say that because it is a humorous way for me to get through the bad days if I happen to have an encounter with a jerk or just feel out of my element. I am sure many of you can relate to that feeling. It is a figure of speech though some people unfortunately have acted upon their own figures of speech and some wonderful souls have been lost in this world to suicide. To some it may seem they took the coward or selfish way out but sometimes it is not that. Sometimes it is how cruel society has become and drove some to the brink of death or wanting to die. 

A friend of mine committed suicide in High School. I’ll never forget that. I will say that there are signs that are either right in front of you or there are silent signs. My point is be kinder, be sincerely yourself and be there for people and not just the people in your circle. Be a smile or a light in someone’s life because you never know when you may need it the most or the impact you may have on that person for the rest of your life. Some of the most vulnerable people are not the ones to be afraid of. They sometimes are a light that need electricity to help their own soul stay alive. The vulnerable are not what some consider the weak, the crazy, the attention seekers, the weirdos, or the outspoken. They are like you and I and some others that just care so much and are trying to find a balance in this world of chaos. 

I’m grateful for my loved ones and my few true friends and even strangers I have met that in their own way help keep me grounded and help spare me the literal portion of “Beam me up Spock!”… Without any of them I would not have the strength to continue in this world of self absorbed humans. 

Be kind to people in this shit hole called earth. The Universe is disgusted and so am I.

Peace, Love, Bliss, and don’t give up,

~Sara-Loretta Hardin~

 

Random Earthly Connections

To many I am Sara-Loretta, to my gamer friends I am Lersania, to some I am nothing, and to some I am something. Whichever it may be I am just that, just myself. The one thing that I have had mentioned to my very few true friends is that I wish the ones that live so far away were easier to just go spontaneously visit. Something that many of you I am sure can understand and relate to is the random connections among strangers that you eventually become close to. Those friendships of mine I cherish and those individuals I hope will always know that loyalty and honesty is something I appreciate and reciprocate. 

I truly believe that childhood experiences can have an affect on connections we as humans make in adulthood but I also feel that when we have endured trauma we tend to have insecurities that can either help or hinder us in those connections with people. Natural instinct for myself is a wall. To protect myself but also to get a sense of the person. If I read you and let my guard down and let myself become vulnerable two things come to my mind. 1. Will I get hurt 2. Will I scare the person off….. In this world I never felt good enough so in a way I think that friendships can make a person feel validated. The problem with that though is that if you don’t feel good about yourself you will constantly question the genuine sincerity of a friend. 

You have to know you are good enough for yourself and deserving of the friendship. Sometimes I think it is better to be upfront especially in society today. There are enough broken individuals where we need to try to be there for one another. It doesn’t mean suck someone down into the deep abyss with you or let them suck you down. It means never judge a book by it’s cover so you get to enchant on an amazing story with people you never met before that could be one of the most gratifying journeys in this life to learn and grow with. Be yourself. 

Sometimes I apologize for who I am as a person. Word of advice from a few who told me the same thing. Don’t. Never apologize for being undeniable uniquely you. What I went through made me who I am. The right people will appear in my life. Ones that embrace me as I need to embrace myself. I’m still a work in progress. We all are.

The connections I have with some people in my life whether near or far I appreciate more than you all know. Those connections I do not have with everyone but when I do have a connection with someone it’s real, special, my heart and soul, so keep it safe please. 

Spread Peace, Love, and Light amid chaos in the world,

Sara-Loretta Hardin

Picture: Today (1/23/20) Hi it’s me and our family dog Max!

Jan2020

Picture: Just me in 2014……Nostalgia with nature!

breathe

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